It’s Friday night in some zone of temporality and a large number of drones are logging on to online dating sites. They are sitting in front of their computers, and they are lounging on the couch on their touchscreen devices, putting their feet up on the cushions. Drones are dating online more often now than five years ago, as the social stigma wears off, and the capacity to have some sort of semi-valuable chance encounter via the comfortable channels of social media grows. Anyone can date online—mothers, college students, baby boomers, even older folks. It’s as easy as getting an email address, and adjusting oneself to another new normal of networked naturalness. Drones of a certain age are reaching that point in their lives when there are multiple worse options than this. Drones are thinking that it’s worth a shot.
Drone date online, but drones don’t think about it the way that humans do. Drones don’t have consciousness, and so they don’t desire or love–at least not in the way we think about it. In fact, “date” is probably a misnomer, but when translating between our human vocabulary and the algorithmic inner sense of an unmanned aerial vehicle, this rough equivalence is the best we can do. They aren’t dating as the end result of a socialized biological imperative. They aren’t looking to fulfill the fairy tale story they have accumulated in their minds over the course of their sexual and social development. They don’t have a psychological need to seek companionship, and to mirror their egos in their image of their closest acquaintances. They don’t have a sex drive that requires recurring fulfillment in the form of performative body narrative.